OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
