I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
