So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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