you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
