And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize