well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i just google imaged poop.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
