evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
