Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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