hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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