You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize