No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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