ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize