I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize