i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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