So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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