Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
