life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
