She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
