I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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