I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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