Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
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