Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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