dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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