Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
