is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
