I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
