and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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