so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Randomize
