a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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