i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
