its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
