All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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