Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
operation have a gay friend backfired
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
