i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
