Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
There are leaves in my underwear?
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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