when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
