You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
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