I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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