Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
