I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
