I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
