oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
