He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
