i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
