you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
