...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize