he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
