do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
