ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
