The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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