I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
