I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
