guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
